What about unmarried women in Islam?

Allah, the Almighty, has created us all to worship Him, and has placed happiness in contentment with what He has decreed for us. Each soul is tested with what elevates its’ rank, purifies it, and makes its’ patience and trust in Him a source of victory, joy, and success.

Thus, not everyone lives the same story. Some are tested with solitude due to a lack of suitable marriage opportunities, while others may not have had the chance to get married because of their bad environment. There are those who received marriage proposals, yet none aligned with their aspirations, where compromises on faith and principles were demanded. Some may have married, only to find no peace or security in their union, leading to divorce. The reasons for continuing life without marriage are many.

That’s why today we see many Muslim women who remain unmarried, regardless of the reasons behind this delay or absence of a spouse. Yet, they can lead lives full of happiness, and perhaps their lives may even be more fulfilling than many married women who are burdened with a bad husband.

 Let us reflect on the Qur’anic narrative and how it treats women, elevating them to the status of servitude to Allah, the most noble of stations, and highest ranks. It makes no difference whether a woman is without a husband or married to a misguided one; her standing in the Hereafter remains unchanged. Take for instance, the story of Maryam, the mother of Isa (peace be upon him), who lived without a husband, yet was a supporter of truth and servant of Allah. In Paradise, she is ranked alongside the Prophets and those who steadfastly affirm the truth. The loss of a husband didn’t prevent her from attaining this exalted position. Similarly, Asia, the wife of Pharaoh—the tyrant who led the greatest of oppression—remained unaffected in her rank as one of the greatest women of the world. She lived through the loss of her husband in her life and was deeply harmed by him, yet she remained steadfast, excelling through her sincere devotion to the oneness of Allah, the Exalted. As Qatada said: “Pharaoh was the most tyrannical and disbelieving man on Earth, but by Allah, his disbelief never harmed his wife, for when she obeyed her Lord, it was to show that Allah—the Exalted—has a just rule, and He does not hold anyone accountable except for their own deeds.”

 It has been narrated in certain hadiths that the Prophet, peace be upon him, will marry Maryam in Paradise, the mother of Isa (peace be upon him), Asiya, the wife of Pharaoh, and Kulthum, the sister of Musa (peace be upon him).  Although all these narrations have weak chains of transmission, as Ibn Kathir, may Allah have mercy on him, stated, the status of the “Lady of the Women of the World” is undoubtedly a sublime and honored position.

Intelligent woman only think of how to save herself from the Fire and attain the highest ranks of Paradise. This can only be achieved through the realization of monotheism and the full understanding of the testimony: “There is no god but Allah, and Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah.” She’s living with the purpose of meeting Allah, content with her deeds, so that He may reward her with an abundant recompense. Don’t think that the loss of souls is without reward; rather, it carries immense reward. Living in the struggle of this world, without support or someone she can dwell in security with, will, by Allah’s will, bring a doubled reward for the one who is patient and works righteously. As Allah, the Exalted, says: *”And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient, Who, when disaster strikes them, say, “Indeed we belong to Allah , and indeed to Him we will return.”  Those are the ones upon whom are blessings from their Lord and mercy. And it is those who are the [rightly] guided.”* (Quran translated, Al-baqara-155-157)

In these moments, among the steadfast and certain women believers, there is one who races forward, undeterred by her circumstances, her position, or her losses. She competes in every condition she finds herself in, as her gaze is fixed upon the horizon where the dwellings of eternal resides. Driven by the words of Allah, the Exalted: *” Look how We have favored [in provision] some of them over others. But the Hereafter is greater in degrees [of difference] and greater in distinction.”* (Quran tranlated, Al-Isra:21), she knows that life is only one station—It is the most important one—through which she transitions from this fleeting world to an everlasting life, the true and paramount existence.

The opportunity now lies in your hands, to engage in righteous deeds and blessed projects, to guard the gaps in a way that pleases Allah, in harmony with your innate nature. Verily, Allāh doesn’t allow to lose reward of those who do good, as He forgets no one. So, have a good opinion of Allah, the Exalted, and seek help through patience and prayer.

 Beware of discontent or feelings of inferiority or inadequacy due to the absence of marriage. The true measure is: *“Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allāh is the most righteous of you.”* (Quran translated, Al-Hujurat:13). And who knows, perhaps if you had married, you would have lost many opportunities for elevating your spirit, or been tested with a husband who would distract you from racing towards Allah with trivial matters and the temptations of this fleeting world. Marriage is a Destiny, a provision, and a test—yet not all marriages are a favor. We often hear stories of women suffering under husbands who don’t fear Allah, or whose worldly distractions make them forget the transient nature of this life.

 Thus, if Allah’s will is for you not to get married, complete acceptance of His divine decree is the highest form of understanding and having an insight. He is the All-Wise, the All-Aware. How many women have found that remaining single was a greater blessing for their faith and their Hereafter, as they steadfastly remained upon the path of righteousness, seeking reward with patience.

 I ask Allah to grant you steadfastness on the path of the believers and to reward you with much goodness in this world and the Hereafter.

 What is lost in this world has a substitute for those who contemplate the deep wisdom of God’s decrees—such as companionship with the Quran, participation in good deeds, and the heart’s connection to what is with God, for these are better and everlasting. Moreover, what can only be fully understood by a woman who attains the high ranks of faith reflects that God is the possessor of great grace.”

Do not behold this world through the eyes of others, but rather, perceive it as the early predecessors did—those who weren’t diverted by marriage or children from serving the faith of Allah and spreading His message. They spent their lives in devotion, struggle, and martyrdom. Allah, Exalted is He, says: *”O you who have believed, let not your wealth and your children divert you from the remembrance of Allāh. And whoever does that – then those are the losers.”* [Quran translated, Al-Munafiqun:9]. And He, Glorious and Majestic, also says: *Wealth and children are [but] adornment of the worldly life. But the enduring good deeds are better to your Lord[792] for reward and better for [one’s] hope.”* [Quran translated, Al-Kahf: 46].

The grace of Allah is vast, bestowing it upon whomsoever He wills, Exalted is He. Therefore, ask Allah for His bounty and strive to become paragons and models of righteousness and uprightness—lofty beacons that embody Islam in the most exemplary manner through your piety, chastity, modesty, and all noble character traits.

 What we construct in this world is, in truth, what we’re building for the Hereafter, and Allah is more merciful to you than anyone else. He is All-Aware, All-Seeing of you and His servants, and to Him belongs the command and the judgment.

 I advise you to engage in the night prayer and to keep the company of remembrance, for it is the best companion and the most faithful friend on the path. Hearts filled with the love of Allah are independent of all others and of everything else. As Ibn Qayyim (may Allah have mercy on him) said, “Whoever seeks Allah sincerely will find Him, and those who find Him are enriched by His presence, needing nothing else.” [The Path of the Two Migrations, 95]. Indeed, the love of Allah alone suffices, and it enriches you beyond all worldly things. Strive for it and exert your utmost efforts to attain it, for the only thing worthy of envy among people is their stations in Paradise, and we cannot reach them without gaining the love of Allah, Glorified and Exalted. And how great is the gentleness of Allah, Exalted is He!          
         

Let the foremost concern in the life of a believing woman be the love of Allah, the Most High, and the cultivation of hubly submission to Allah in her acts of worship towards Him. Being hubly submissive is the secret to happiness and the soul of worship. It’s the key to the bliss of faith and the sweetness of remembrance. And how great is the tenderness of Allah, Exalted be He!

 I seek refuge for you from the trials of this world and from every subtle enticement of Satan’s steps. Guarding one’s soul in these times is the most crucial concern for women; do not weaken nor allow the devil to lure you into the paths of misguidance and the unraveling of your purpose. By Allah, what is with Allah is far better than all that this world contains. Oh, how I wish for you to remain steadfast in memorizing and studying the Book of Allah (Quran), for it is the gateway to triumphs for those who are sincere. I emphasize, again and again, to every Muslim woman and young girl… O servants of Allah, protect yourselves! And beware, lest anyone divert you from the path of striving for Allah’s pleasure.

I remind you that your covenant is with God, and the approval of anyone else will not benefit you unless God grants it to you.  Seek only His [God’s] pleasure, and let the displeasure of others not concern you.

 You are in a struggle [Jihad] in this world; be steadfast until God permits these souls to ascend, returning to their original abode in paradise. There, no one will enter without a companion. You will find couples of the highest virtues, loved by God and His Messenger.

 Let your ambitions be lofty, and your desires noble. Work hard, for in that you may become deserving of marrying the best of God’s servants in the hereafter. And who knows?  By the grace of God, she might find herself married to a man she never imagined in this world.

 Ibn al-Qayyim, may Allah have mercy on him, says: 

“And when the world contracts upon you entirely, and there is no dwelling for you within it known,

Then hasten to the gardens of ‘Adn, for they are our true abodes, and therein lies our camp.

But we are captives of the enemy, so do you think we shall return to our homelands in peace?

And they claim that when the enemy distances himself and his lands are far, he is burdened with loss.

Yet, what exile could surpass the one we endure, where our enemies now rule over us?”

 Know that all who enter Paradise are in the utmost beauty and perfection, and that the variation in this beauty depends on one’s rank, status, faith, and righteous deeds. For all the superficial details of this world fade away, and only righteous deeds remain to elevate their bearer.

In a narration from Abu Huraira, may Allah be pleased with him, the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, said: “The first batch (of people) who will enter Paradise will be (glittering) like the full moon, and the batch next to them will be (glittering) like the most brilliant star in the sky.” [Bukhari and Muslim]

 In a narration from Muslim, the Prophet, peace be upon him, said: “The first group of my Ummah to get into Paradise would be like a full moon in the night. Then those who would be next to them; they would be like the most significantly glittering stars in regard to brightness, then after them (others) in ranks.”

Al-Iraqi, in *Tahr al-Tathreeb*, explained: “Then thereafter, their ranks will differ, meaning that their degrees of brightness will vary according to the elevation of their ranks and the disparity in their merits.”

 In *Manar al-Qari*, the concise explanation of *Sahih al-Bukhari* states: “The meaning of the hadith is that the Prophet, peace be upon him, describes all the inhabitants of Paradise as being endowed with beauty and radiance, though they differ in their degrees, based on their actions and merits. The first group to enter Paradise will shine like the moon on the fourteenth night, when its fullness is complete, its light reaches its peak, and it becomes the most radiant, beautiful, and majestic. In another narration, it is stated that seventy thousand of my ummah will enter Paradise, their faces glowing with the brightness of the full moon. As for the second group, they will resemble the brightest and most luminous of stars.”

 Have good thoughts of Allah, for with Him are many servants, and He is the All-Knowing, the All-Seeing, aware of what is best for them and what suits them in their spouses. Yet, if marriage is not destined for you in this world, find contentment in His decree.

 In Paradise, there is perfection and completion, free from any blemish, pain, or loss. Every believing soul will find peace, stability, and eternal happiness.

 For the sake of the lofty ranks of Paradise, every loss becomes bearable. There is no doubt that the loss of a spouse or someone she can dwell in security with in this world is a tremendous trial; yet, to bear it with patience and gratitude is a mark of wisdom and insight. The Prophet, peace be upon him, said: “The greater the tribulation, the greater the reward. When Allah loves people, He tests them. So whoever is content, for him is pleasure; and whoever is discontent, for him is displeasure.” (Sunan al-Tirmidhi)

 A woman’s rank in Paradise is determined by the struggle she endures and the patience she demonstrates throughout her life. Allah elevates her station, rewards her generously, and grants her the rank of martyrs, according to her sincerity and devotion. Allah, the Exalted, says: *”So do not weaken and do not grieve, and you will be superior if you are [true] believers.If a wound should touch you – there has already touched the [opposing] people a wound similar to it. And these days [of varying conditions] We alternate among the people so that Allāh may make evident those who believe and [may] take to Himself from among you martyrs – and Allāh does not like the wrongdoers”* (Quran translated, Al-Imran:139-140)

 *“We have been your friends in the life of this world and are (so) in the Hereafter. Therein you shall have (all) that your inner-selves desire, and therein you shall have (all) for which you ask.”* (Quran translated, Fussilat: 31)

 What remains after this divine narration but to strive and compete for the love, pleasure, acceptance, and exalted ranks with the chosen ones of Allah?

 O Allah, make us among those of whom You said in Your glorious words: *”And whoever obeys Allāh and the Messenger – those will be with the ones upon whom Allāh has bestowed favor of the prophets, the steadfast affirmers of truth, the martyrs and the righteous.

And excellent are those as companions.”* (Quran translated, An-nis’a :69) And You also said, *And the first forerunners [in the faith] among the Muhājireen[Those who emigrated from Makkah and settled in Madīnah for the cause of Islām.] and the Anṣār[The inhabitants of Madīnah who had accepted Islām and assisted the Prophet (ﷺ) and other emigrants upon their arrival there.] and those who followed them with good conduct – Allāh is pleased with them and they are pleased with Him, and He has prepared for them gardens beneath which rivers flow, wherein they will abide forever. That is the great attainment.”* (Quran translated, At-Tawbah:100)

Dr- Layla Hamdan

Translated by